


Date Night

by Kalikuks



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Bar Fight, Jesse has that BAMF buckle for A Reason, M/M, Swearing, badassery, plans gone awry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-15
Updated: 2017-09-15
Packaged: 2018-12-30 02:04:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12098307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kalikuks/pseuds/Kalikuks
Summary: Jesse and Hanzo just want to go on a proper date for once, that's all. It doesn't go quite as planned.





	Date Night

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this just because I liked the mental image of Hanzo throwing someone through a table during a bar fight.
> 
> This is unbeta'd, so there might be mistakes.

“Baby, don’tcha think it’s a lil’ fucked up we ain’t ever had a proper date?”

Hanzo turns to blink at McCree, taking his eyes off of the politician they are supposed to be watching. Both men had been deployed to the gala they were attending for the sole purpose of escorting said politician. Nothing so far had happened at least, and it was nearing the end of the night, so McCree had taken the opportunity to broach the subject. Hanzo was less likely to grouse and get grumpy with Jesse for the distraction when it was apparent nothing was going to occur.

So Jesse takes the opportunity to sweep at their surroundings in a grand gesture, “I mean, look at all o’ this, Babydoll. All this glitz an’ glam. Hell, I’m in a tux, Sugar, we both are. You’re lookin’ mighty fine, by the way, don’t think I told ya. But the point stands, darlin’. A tux. I could be dancin’ with ya, sweep ya offa your feet like a proper gentleman like I shoulda done a long time ago. But we’re workin’.” Jesse’s got the sense to keep his rant to at least Hanzo’s hearing range, so the archer lets his lover continue with raised eyebrows. “An’ the museum last time? We worked then too. I don’t think you an’ I have ever been offa base together for anythin’ but missions. Ever.”

Jesse certainly expects to be scolded, but Hanzo’s face is surprisingly considering as the archer takes a glance at their surroundings while he processes his lover’s words. Eventually, Hanzo flicks his gaze back up to Jesse’s.

“You’re right.” Hanzo even drifts closer to Jesse, wraps an arm around Jesse’s and lets his head rest on his cowboy-in-a-tux’s shoulder, “We’ve taken very few opportunities for… us.” 

“This mean you’ll let me take ya out somewhere?” Jesse dips a little so he can kiss Hanzo’s cheek quickly before resting his head on Hanzo’s, the corner of Jesse’s mouth lifting when Hanzo nuzzles against him, “Like… ta a cute little cafe?”

“I would be incredibly disappointed if there was no coffee shop involved.” Hanzo points out, “Admittedly, I’ve never gone on a proper date before.”

“Now that’s a tragedy and a half.” Jesse laments, “I’ll haveta find the cutest little cafe close enough to the base ta take ya to.”

 “A bar would also suffice.” Hanzo admits, “You promised to take me to your favourite one in Gibraltar when we first started seeing each other.”

“I did, didn’t I?”

Hanzo smiles knowingly up at Jesse, “Indeed. Perhaps we can go once we return home.”

The mission itself doesn’t take much longer, with Jesse and Hanzo escorting the politician they were babysitting all night back into the hands of their personal bodyguards. Once the politician is under the watch of their bodyguards, it’s time for Hanzo and Jesse to head home. There’s always a lull between missions, since Overwatch in the meantime is essentially acting like mercenaries for hire, so it’s not long before Jesse and Hanzo come up with a plan for a date night in the nearest town to the Watchpoint.

Something had come up with Genji right before they left for the bar though, so Hanzo told Jesse he would catch up to him, which leads to Jesse sitting at the bar nursing bourbon while waiting for his Honey. It’s a quiet night at least, which he’s grateful for. The less drunks he and Hanzo have to deal with the better, Jesse’s had enough of that for a while with the last few missions involving escorting rich snobs with too much alcohol in their systems.

Jesse’s in the middle of pondering if this establishment he enjoys so much carries sake for Hanzo when the door swings open and a group of five men enter. At first Jesse pays them no mind since they’re clearly not Hanzo but when they bully the handful of other patrons out of the bar it gets his attention. Soon it’s only them, him, and the barkeep who is looking between them all nervously. Two of the men move to block the entrances and three approach Jesse’s table. Naturally, that’s when the gentlemen pull their weapons out, all aimed at Jesse.

“Can I help you fellas?” Jesse asks, nonchalantly pulling a cigarillo out from a pocket and lighting it. He takes a long drag and levels his gaze at the men, “You’re ruinin’ a perfectly good night.”

“We’ll be havin’ a perfect night ourselves when we take you in. You’ve got a lot of zeroes on your head, Mr. McCree.”

The tallest and broader built of the strangers is the one who speaks, and Jesse figures he’s the fella running this impromptu bounty hunt. Well, it’s certainly put a damper on his plans. Jesse’s phone suddenly dings from where he’s set it on the table, a message from Hanzo. _On way_ , it reads, _ETA is about two minutes. See you soon, my love._ Jesse can’t hide the smirk on his face if he tries.

“Well, y’all are welcome to try,” Jesse says amiably, grinning, “but let me let ya in on a little secret. I got a Honey all my own an’ he’s gonna be fit ta kill if he sees y’all causin’ trouble an’ ruinin’ our plans.”

“Sure,” the little hunting party’s ring leader spits, “An’ I’m the bloody Queen of England.”

Jesse leans back, smug grin as his cigarillo is held smoldering between his metal fingers and he takes a swig of bourbon, “Pleased ta meet ya, your Majesty.”

The man is not pleased in the slightest with Jesse’s sass, and makes to step threateningly towards the indifferent outlaw, pointedly cocking his gun and leveling it between Jesse’s eyes, “I would stop being smart, if I was you.”

“You really don’t know what you’re gettin’ inta if you ask me of all people ta stop bein’ smart.” Jesse remains unfazed, even with the gun in his face. It’s not the first time he’s had firearms shoved in his face, and it won’t be his last, “How about you start bein’ smart an’ leave before I put a bullet between your eyes. An’ believe me, that would be more humane then lettin’ my Honey get at you. You should wanna leave before my Honey arrives. He ain’t as nice ‘bout these things as me.”

“You’re lyin’, I know you work alone.” The gun is shoved further in Jesse’s face, and Jesse’s more concerned the barkeep will be shot if this joker won’t stop waving it around. “You got ten seconds to put your gun on the table and leave with us, or we’ll shoot you and drag you out.”

Jesse purses his lips for a second, pretends to mull it over in his head before he takes a long drag of his cigarillo and blows the smoke into the man threatening him with the gun’s face, “How ‘bout you go fuck yourself?”

The man is red in the face with anger, and his finger starts to twitch on the trigger. Jesse just calmly stares him down all the while, resting the bourbon he’s been nursing this entire time on the table. The man and Jesse’s little showdown is interrupted all of a sudden by a concise, polite knock on the main door of the bar. Jesse’s smile widens as the men exchange confused looks right before the door is kicked in entirely, the man guarding it nearly flattened by the impact of it.

Jesse himself uses the distraction provided to throw back his bourbon before promptly tugging the man in front of him closer by the arm and smashing the glass over his head. While it doesn’t knock the man out, it staggers him and makes him drop the gun, which Jesse kicks away.

“Hey Sweetheart, you’re just in time!” Jesse calls to Hanzo, his beloved archer currently roundhouse kicking one of the remaining four men in the face, “You always knew how ta make an entrance! Man after my own heart.”

Hanzo glances over to Jesse briefly with a raised eyebrow before he’s kicking one of the heavy oak tables over to block a shot from one of the remaining three men. Jesse takes the opportunity to head-butt the ringleader of the hunting party in the nose. He follows it up by kneeing the man in the gut then bringing the elbow of his prosthetic down on the man’s head.

When that finally knocks the man out Jesse huffs out, “Thick headed jackass.”

There’s a half full bottle of whiskey on the table next to Jesse that he scoops up, just as Hanzo sends a man flying into that particular table. The wood splinters under the thug’s weight and sends it all crashing down. Jesse finally draw’s Peacekeeper, only to flip her to grip her by the muzzle in order to pistol whip the man as he tries to get up from the ruins of the table. There’s two men left, and Jesse’s pretty sure he can see the realization hit them both at the exact same time that they bit off way more then they could chew in coming after him.

The call of all those zeroes on Jesse’s head is too much for one of them, it seems, because he’s lifting a pistol of his own to shoot at Jesse. Too bad Jesse’s faster, and the next second sees the man yowling in pain and clutching his hand from Jesse shooting the gun out of his grip. Hanzo takes the opportunity to swing at the man and knock him right out.

Both Hanzo and Jesse round on the last man standing, who promptly drops his gun and points at the mastermind of their bounty hunting team writhing on the floor half conscious, “It was his idea.”

Hanzo’s stomping over to the man before Jesse can stop him, and he yanks the fellow by the collar so he’s forced to look the furious archer in the eye. “You will take the mercy we’ve shown you,” Hanzo grits out to the terrified man, “and remove your friends from the premises when they come to. If there is ever another threat to my Jesse, you will be dealing not only with me, but with them.”

To prove his point, Hanzo pulls up his left sleeve, crackles of blue writhing along the ink of his tattoo before the very visible ethereal form of a dragon crests from his skin. The man pales and nods rapidly, trying to pull away. Hanzo shoves the terrified man against the wall roughly without thought and moves to Jesse’s side.

“Are you hurt, Anata?” Hanzo’s all sweetness again when he looks over Jesse for injury, concern written plain on his face.  
  
“Nah, my regular knight in shinin’ armor came blazin’ in an’ rescued little ol’ me.” Jesse teases, taking his hat off and resting it over his heart, “Ya know how ta make a man swoon, Babe.”  
  
Hanzo fondly rolls his eyes and leans up to smooch Jesse on the lips gently, “I am pleased that you are unharmed. I take it they came for your bounty?”  
  
“Yeah.” Jesse looks sheepish, and scratches the back of his head and returns his hat to its place on his head so he can hide under the brim of it, “Sorry ‘bout this. Our plans got ruined because these assholes tracked me down.”  
  
“It’s fine, Jess.” Hanzo tips Jesse’s face back up and smiles gently, “You’re an outlaw, I’m an assassin. These things will happen, we’re far from a normal couple.”  
  
Jesse just huffs a laugh before sliding an arm around Hanzo’s waist, “Guess so, huh.” Jesse scuffs his boot on the floor. “So… does that mean you’d rather not try the cafe or…?”  
  
Hanzo presses into Jesse’s side and slides his arm around Jesse’s waist now, “If it’s still open, we can try the cafe.”  
  
Their leaving the bar is interrupted by the very shaken, but very angry bar keep, “You’re going to at least pay after everything you’ve put me through for the umpteenth time, McCree? Before I actually call the cops on you this time.”  
  
It’s Hanzo who approaches the bar while Jesse shrugs in the background, digging through his pockets for some of the credit chips he sometimes carries around from his old assassination contracts. The archer slaps a few thousand worth on the countertop, the dragons writhing under his skin and along his tattoo again at yet another threat to Jesse.  
  
“Keep the change.”   
  
The barkeep has more bravado than the man still cowering as far away from Hanzo as possible, and Hanzo ponders just how many bar fights Jesse’s caused as he watches the bar keep tiredly collect the payment. With the bartender satisfied, both of them finally leave the bar. It’s only when they’re both halfway down the street that Jesse brandishes the half finished bottle of whiskey.  
  
“You took that?!”

Jesse just takes a swig and offers it to Hanzo with a shrug, “It was there.”  
  
Hanzo accepts the offered bottle and takes a swig of it himself, “Next time, find the abandoned sake.”  
  
Jesse laughs all the way to the cafe.

**Author's Note:**

> If you wanna chat at me about McHanzo or any other of the pairings I ship, catch me on my fic tumblr [Angstgremlin](http://angstgremlin.tumblr.com)


End file.
